And this post. Which is a total outlier on my blog for many many reasons. I’m the type of essentialist (had to look that up, I’m not an academic) that is always changing her mind.
When I wrote this post, I was at a low-point in my life as a single girl. At the time, I attended a birthday party for an alpha-male where there were a lot of girls in heavy makeup, push-up bras and short skirts. I was the make-upless girl in glasses and wearing a man’s shirt, baggy jeans and Chucks.
Despite the fact that all these other girls were angling for the attention of the alpha-male, and I was relatively indifferent, he ended up suddenly, aggressively coming on to me later that night. Any of these other girls would have been flattered by this attention. I was not. I found it an upsetting, strange experience.
And I thought… what’s the point of dressing slutty anyway? It sure didn’t get these girls what they wanted. Dressing slutty doesn’t work. It doesn’t look sexy, it looks fake and silly and desperate.
So, I wanted to write about that idea somehow but I was feeling insecure about revealing my own experience, as it crosses a line into what I consider private. Which was a big mistake that Sarah alerted me to at the time. Bad writing, confused thinking. I ended up framing it topically, around the Slutwalk (which I still don’t “get”). The post ended up being so ridiculously “problematic” reading this post actually makes me shake my head and laugh now. It may be the most ass-backwards post I’ve ever written, probably most of all because it contradicts my libertarian attitude towards fashion.
This I believe; people are free to wear anything they want, even if it’s ugly, stupid, undignified or offensive, and people are free to voice opinions on what people wear, even if their comments are ugly, stupid, undignified or offensive.
So, why do I leave a stupid, undignified, offensive post up on my site? I do consider deleting it from time to time. I hesitate to do it because this post and the reactions I got from it did inform a lot of later, better posts, which refer back to this one.
If this is the first (or last) impression people get of my blog, it’s not a good one. I probably lose a few readers, like this one.
finds amazing fashion blogger, falls in love
read all through blog: final post left to read:
gender essentialism & don’t dress like a slut
nothing else on the blog prepared me for this where did this come from
(Source: somethingaboutfailureandhomo)
